I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
