We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
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someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
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His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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