Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I feel like abortions should bother me more
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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