Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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