420 ftw
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
