using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
