you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Randomize
