And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
