They should really pass out barf bags in church
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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