that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
