A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
