I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize