Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
