I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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