I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
