My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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