It's Friday. Sex?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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