im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize