p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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