I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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