I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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