Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
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