i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Randomize
