i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
