So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize