He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Randomize
