ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize
