So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
