Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
