I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize