So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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