Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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