3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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