And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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