I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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