there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
