You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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