Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
