Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
