White coat. Heels.
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
