Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
