Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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