Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
