found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
