she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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