i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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