My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
