FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
