i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
