i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize